As a millennial, I’ve seen and heard it all. Call me boring and maybe even conservative, but I’m just not into what everyone else is doing these days.

Whenever I go out with my friends, I constantly see them looking down at their phones, swiping left and right like a madman. I also hear the many complaints of whenever one of them gets ‘ghosted”, and it just makes me even more uninterested in participating in dating apps like Tinder and Bumble.

Frankly, I just don’t see the point. Whatever happened to meeting someone naturally? What exactly about forced interactions appeals to people?

Trust is also something that many lack these days. With social media, it’s easy to catch your eye on someone else, as it makes you realize just how many options you have. People tend to feel insecure and jealous when they can see their significant others liking others’ photos on Instagram, and it’s quite unhealthy. Cheating is still a common occurrence, especially since it’s so easy to slide into someone’s instagram DM’s without your partner knowing. In retrospect, social media plays a huge part in why modern dating is so toxic now.

I thought the childish ways of people would end after high school, but that’s not the case at all. I’ve noticed that even those well into their mid-to-late twenties are immature as ever; after seeing co-workers and peers getting together, going out with them and seeing how clingy everyone is, it truly shows just how dependent millennials are in this generation. There are people who get into a relationship one after another, never seen alone or single even for a month, which shows just how replaceable you can be to someone.

These days, it’s hard for many to stay committed, as commitment isn’t something that many people seem to want in a relationship. The constant “You’re cute, I like you, but I don’t want this to be serious” is getting old now.

It’s understandable for young people to want to experiment and have fun before making the decision on if they want to settle down. However, this doesn’t make our generation’s obsession with social media and cravings for intimacy any healthier. Dating is no longer taken as seriously, and with social media apps having taken over, it’s hard to tell when a relationship is truly genuine or not. It can be hard to tell when someone is looking for a relationship or when they’re looking for a one-night stand, and playing mind games isn’t fun for anyone.

As millennials are known as the “hookup generation,” (thank you, Netflix and chill) it’s hard to take anyone seriously these days. Thanks to technology, it’s easy to cut someone off as you’re not forced into any awkward face-to-face interactions if you don’t want to, increasing the art of ghosting. 

 

It’s not as simple as it used to be, and people are taking communication more strategically than is has to be. Was that emoji too much? It’s been 3 hours, why hasn’t she responded yet? Instant messaging has shaped us to believe that there is a certain way to talk to people, and often it depends on responding within an appropriate amount of time that doesn’t come across as “too excited,” to show just how unattached and “cool” we are. It’s mindless logic, really. 

Dating shouldn’t be a race, nor should it be forced. There’s no definitive rulebook stating that you should be in a relationship by a certain age, or that you have to be in a relationship ever. There shouldn’t be pressure to find someone for “cuffing season” just for the sake of it. If you are in a relationship that you’re happy about, then be sure to cherish it — if not, don’t stress.